Serve

I'm not sure how anyone can look at a homeless person, or poor person and see anything other than a hurting human being. I have been volunteering at the local soup kitchen, and whenever I see a person is done eating, I try to help them out by taking their plate and throwing it in the garbage for them. To me I thought of it as just a little more service, a little more kindness, and one more chance at interaction before they go back into the world. Today, I asked one of the women if I could throw her plate away, and she said sure, so I did just that. No sooner had the plate hit the trash can, than one of the staff members reprimanded me for "pampering" the guests. He told me they could throw their own plate away. I didn't even know what to say. I stuttered a few words and went back to my work. But inside my heart was breaking. Had they become so numb to the needs around them? Could they have forgotten why the soup kitchen was even there? Yes it was to meed their physical needs, but aren't their emotional needs just as important? Isn't showing them a little kindness a part of the job description? I mean Jesus didn't come to be served, but to serve... shouldn't we be doing the same? I don't know, maybe I'm not being fair to him, but I look at each of the people that come in and I know that they each must have a story, and a life, and some sort of family. they aren't just someone taking up a seat, they are living and breathing creations of God. I hope that I will never lose sight of that!

yumminess

I have a new addiction... and it's name is Pinterest. It's a website dedicated to virtual pinboards, and I have gotten all kinds of cool recipes from it. I've only had the opportunity to make one of them, but it was super easy and super delicious!

Smores Croissants

1 bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 bag of mini marshmallows
1 roll of croissants

First you lay out the dough, and then put the chocolate chips at the top of the croissant (the widest part). Then put the mini marshmallows on top and roll into a croissant and put on a baking tray. Bake at 375 for between 11-13 minutes depending on your oven! Then remove, let them cool for around 2 or 3 minutes and enjoy smore heaven. So delicious... so simple... so magic.

I made them for my life group... and needless to say there were none left at the end of the night!

Lukewarm

I've said it before... but I don't think I can say it enough. I love my church! Yesterday Pastor Paul talked about the parable of the sower. I'm sure you've heard it before... ya know the one where some of the seed falls on hard ground, some rocky ground, some thorny soil, and some good soil. I've heard it a thousand times before, but God word always has something new to offer us! I think the thing that stood out to me the most this time around was the purpose of parables. I mean, why did Jesus have to tell a little story, why couldn't He just say what He meant? My pastor said it this way, Jesus spoke in parables to either drive us closer or further away from God. If it drove us closer, than awesome! We would be pushed out of complacency and forced into action. If it drove us further away from God... well also awesome, because at that point we would have to start searching for God. Sometimes we have to be pushed further away to remind us of how much we really NEED Him. God doesn't need lukewarm, complacent, baby christians. Revelation 3:16 says, "So because you are lukewarm, neither hot or cold, I am about to spit you out of my mouth." Over the summer, I was lukewarm. I was stuck in my comfort and complacency and I felt far from God. Finally I felt so alone, and so far from God that I realized I had to start taking action... whether I "felt" close to God or not. I got back to Lburg and I got more involved. In my church, in my community... just in general. I started spending more time reading my bible, more time talking to God, and more time with people that would/could keep me accountable. And before I knew it, my fire was back... and the luke warm was gone. Before I could be on fire again, God had to remind me of how terrible things are when I'm not close to Him. He reminded me that when I'm trying to find my joy in other things I'm setting myself up for a fall. Being lukewarm doesn't please God. You won't get a "well done my good and faithful child" just for going to church on Sunday morning and being a pretty good person. God wants, and expects more from us than that. Nothing of significance is done for the kingdom by being comfortable.

Usable... no matter what my flaw

You know that verse in the bible that talks about how God uses our weaknesses to bring him glory? Yeah... well I experienced that last night. Every Friday night some people from my church and I prayer walk the neighborhood our building is in. So far it's been such an incredible experience, and this Friday night was no different. I walked around with two other people and we were walking and chit chatting, talking about a million different things, one of them being how none of us are very good with kids. We like them, but well... they don't like us as much! haha So we're walking and we run into a group of kids playing football in the middle of the street. We played with them, and talked with them, and found out about their life. It was awesome.Then we kept walking and we ran into more kids and we hung out, and played and talked. And once again, it was awesome. We reached these kids, we invested in their lives even a little bit and hopefully we'll be able to continue to grow a relationship with them each week! And the funny part is all of us claimed that we weren't kid people. But the thing is... God uses us in His infinite grace to bring glory to Him. He doesn't just use our strengths, but He uses our weaknesses! Sooo even when we feel like God can't use us, BAM He comes out of left field, using our shortcomings! My lack of a "knack with kids"? Used, along with two others, to reach the kiddies of my neighborhood. Just sayin... my God is pretty dang amazing.

It's only Wednesday??!!

It's been a looooong week... and it's only Wednesday. But you know what, I'm discovering that it's during the not so awesome weeks that I am the closest to God, because I'm talking to Him more than ever. God's goodness and provision in my life is even more evident during the backaches and the heartaches. Tonight, I will sleep soundly, and I will wake up in the morning with God's name on my lips, because He is my strength and my portion forever.

Wise words by Andy Stanley

Are you the person the person your looking for, is looking for? I know, a little confusing, but that is the question Andy Stanley asks in his sermon series entitled "The New Rules for Sex, Love, and Dating". Do you ever think about that? We have this list of qualities we are looking for, but do we ever think about whether or not we have the qualities they are looking for? Are we aiming to meet their "standards"? Click the above link... and be INSPIRED : )

Blessed by blessing others

Tonight I walked through the neighborhood surrounding my church with some dear friends... and prayed. We prayed for the neighborhood, we prayed that God would do a new thing in the neighborhood, and we even got to pray with people. It was an amazing night for it, with a gorgeous breeze and the heat was finally starting to leave the air. People were sitting on their porches and we were ready to reach them with the hope that Jesus offers. I got to pray with this older woman, named Pearl. She has arthritis, and it causes her a lot of pain but her joy just radiated from her. She called all of us "shuga" and gave us all big hugs. And there was another woman named Linda who had lost her husband 3 months ago. She said she had been just spent most of the night in tears, because she just couldn't get over the loss of her husband. She needed deep prayer, so we all laid hands on her and prayed that God would be her love and her joy. It was just such an incredible experience. If I had not been willing to step outside myself and step out of my own little bubble I never would have been able to be so blessed by these people. I don't think I'm the only Christian that gets stuck there. We talk a good game, but when push comes to shove we have "better" things to do on a Friday night then pray for a neighborhood. We are perfectly content with our baby christianity and so we do our thang and we forget those who need Jesus the most. I don't want that to be me. I don't want to be so caught up with myself that I forget others. I want to put others and their needs above my own, and I want God to use me to do big things for His kingdom. I don't want to be so consumed with my own life that I miss the prayer walks and the other doors that God opens. We don't need to go anywhere but our own backyard to reach people for God... so lets do it! Lets change our attitude, and remember that our life is not our own. Go for a walk... build relationships... seek others.... and God WILL work!

quick nugget

I love coffee... specifically iced coffee. If you ask any of my friends... nay any of my acquaitances they will tell you that Sarah Knudsen LOVES coffee. So needless to say when I found this little nugget of iced coffee wisdom I was pretty pumped, so I thought I'd share it with you! : )

The perfect iced coffee : )

Quitter



I just finished reading "Quitter" by Jon Acuff (the author of Stuff Christians Like), and let me just say it was AWESOME! Totally hilarious, totally convicting, and totally practical. There was a whole lot of information so I'm reading it again so I can absorb more of what he said. The main thing that I got out of it was that acheiving your dream... and "closing the gap between your day job and your dream job" takes patience, hard work and dedication. We are the "get it now" generation. We want what we want when we want it. We don't want to have to wait, and we definitely don't want it to take hard work. But our dreams are worth working for... are biggest and best dreams are going to take effort, and time, and lots of wisdom. I know I definitely needed that reminder. The best dreams don't happen in a moment, but take care, time, and love to truly flourish.

It's purging time

I like clothes... like a lot. Oh and I also like shoes and purses... a lot. Throughout the years I have managed to accumulate way to much stuff. Between a packed closet and plastic bins filled with purses I'm on material overload. I have been feeling really convicted about the amount of stuff I have, so last night when I got home from work I decided it was time to purge. Time to purge things I hadn't worn... time to purge things that weren't as modest as they should be... time to purge the excess. I started to clear out my closet, and with each item I took out I felt a little better, which motivated me to take out another item, and another item. It was liberating to clear away the clutter piece by piece. Somehow it felt I was doing more than just making room in my closet. It felt like it was the beginning of a simpler life with less stuff. The purging was the easy part. Now comes the tough part... not adding double what I just took out.

Here's the pile of clothes I cleared out... and that pile is only going to continue to grow! The more I clean out, the better I feel. Once I collect it all I'm going to take everything that is in good shape to good will so that my clothes can have a second life with someone who might need them more than I did! Have you ever purged your closet? I strongly suggest you try it... it's a pretty awesome feeling! 

A challenge

I have a challenge for you guys (and myself). I challege you to not complain at all for a week, not even to "vent". Lately I've been really convicted about the amount of time I complain in my conversations, sometimes calling it "venting", but the bible says, "Do everything without complaining or arguing". I'm not saying this will be easy, and I will probably slip up, but I'm going to make it a priority to bring all my thoughts to God to keep myself from grumbling about the little things in life. Do you think you could go a week without "grumbling"?

Tattoos

Its that time of year again... time for a new tattoo. What they say is true, once you get one you keep wanting more! I have a few ideas for what I want I'm just not sure which one to go with first. Here are the two that I've narrowed it down to:

This would be on my right upper arm

This would be on my right shoulder... and would obv be a different font



Obviously I'm not very artistically talented, but these are general ideas of what I want... what do you think?

Here's to awesome weekends

I'd say this weekend was one for the books! It started with sweet frog ( a local frozen yogurt place ) and some bro sis time and then add an awesome downtown farmers market and my favorite coffee shop into the mix, ending it all with a fantastic church service and small group leaders meeting and I'd say it was simply perfect.

Also, here's some shout outs to some ballin companies, making a difference in our world! Their initiative and heart for others excites me!

Project 7

Hello Somebody

TOMS shoes and eye wear

Last but not least, this is a non profit owned my friend Kevin... it's pretty ballin! He loves people... like a lot!

Impact Georgia

Why?

I do this thing where I constantly question why God does things... I'm a pretty inquisitive person and that includes my interactions with Abba. I seem to put Him in a box and limit Him and His capabilities to my own understanding. If I don't get it than it can't be so... I always seem to be asking God to explain. But you know what, I'm not always going to know why, and neither will you. I'm reading "Erasing Hell" by Francis Chan and while a large portion of the book talks about Hell's existence and how long people go there for, the chapter I'm reading now talks about how just because we don't understand how or why God could do something doesn't mean that God couldn't do it. Like I personally don't completely understand how my kind, loving, merciful God could send anyone to Hell, but I know that He does. We don't have to understand, we just have to know that God, at the very center of who He is, is good and just and we just have to trust that. We won't always know the answer to why, but we can always count on God being who He says He is. Nothing is too difficult or impossible for Him! "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."(Isaiah 55:9)

Virginia Sunsets

Two of my favorite parts of God's creation... Sunsets and Mountains

And I get to see this view everyday... talk about blessed!! : )

LOVE

I.Am.Single. 21 years old, and not a man in sight, but you know what? That's ok with me. Don't get me wrong there are time when I struggle with being single... and going to a Christian university where the mantra for young females is "ring by spring" doesn't help my situation, but I am confident that in this time and place being single is right. But if I'm being honest, I can't wait to be married, I pray that this is a part of God's plan for me. I long for that more than traveling or career success or any other dream I might have. One of the deepest desires of my heart is to be married... to be a Godly wife to a Godly man. And to add insult to injury almost every one of my closest friend is either dating someone, engaged or married and there are days when I feel like the lone wolf... for some reason the summer was tough with this. But lately I have been feeling so rejuvenated... and I'm rediscovering my purpose... I had lost it for a little while. God is reminding me that in this time of singleness I can give him more than I ever have before. I can take the focus off of myself, and off of feeling sorry for myself and give my focus completely to God and others. My church's slogan is "Love God, Love People" and I want to adopt that as my own. This life isn't about me... it isn't about my struggles or even your struggles. Life is about love... "if I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol... these three remain, faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love". Love God and Love People.

Quote I like

Here's a quote from Captivating that I really liked... it rang true for me, I hope it does the same for you.

"... our negative emotions can become indulgences. When we camp our hearts in self-doubt, condemning thoughts or even shame because those emotions have become familiar and cofortable, we are faithlessly indulging rather than allowing our deep ache to draw us to God."
-Captivating

Also, this is my verse for the semester... "See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."-Isaiah 43:19. I see the beginnings of what God has in store for this year... and it's new and exciting and I can't wait to see what He does!!

worn shoes...

these are my first pair of TOMS...

They are wonderful and comfortable and have holes in the toes. I think that the most worn things are the most loved. Like a bible with bent pages and frayed edges... or my favorite pair of TOMS. Worn things are used a lot and loved a lot... sometimes worn=best. I think I'll wear these until they fall off my feet! : )

New school year... new start... newish blog

So I'm not really sure if anyone still reads this, but I've decided to revamp it a lil bit! For a year I wrote in this blog almost every day, sharing what God was teaching me and how I was applying what I was learning. It was almost like a journal for... a way to gauge how far I had come and how far I still needed to go. Now a little over a year later, I'm going to start expanding what I write about. Instead of it just being lessons I'm learning, I want it to be a place for me to share anything and everything... whether it be a yummy recipe, a cool picture, a song lyric, or a story I want to share the joy of the Lord on this blog. A relationship with God isn't all about lessons... there is freedom and joy in Him!! I'm ready to embrace life and find the joy and magic in each small moment! : )

Grace

Recently my parents were royally screwed over by someone they thought was a close friend. He was someone they loved and trusted and he took that love and trust and threw it back in their faces. It seems to have broken both my parents hearts, but I think more so my dad. He feels like somehow he's the one to blame for the whole mess, and he doesn't really like to talk about. It seems like everyday they find out another way this guy hurt them... but the emotion my dad has been choosing is not the one I often do... aka anger. Instead he has been defending this man, and showing him this incredible amount of grace. Instead of concentrating on the bad that was done, my amazing father is choosing to see the good that he did. My automatic reaction is to want justice... but in my dad's eyes the bill is already paid in full. This love reminds me of the love my heavenly father gives to me. Even when I forget Him and ignore Him and put other "gods" before Him, He still loves me and heaps grace on me. How lucky am I that I get two daddies that extend grace even when it is undeserved.

Journey Day 407

I just love that verse I posted last night. First off... "see I am doing a new thing." I love the idea that God can take the bad things in our life, or the unfortunate circumstances and make them into something new that He can use. I know that when I'm going through a valley there is nothing better than remembering that even in that moment God is doing a new thing in my life. Then God gives a little bit more hope for us... "I am making a way in the desert, and streams in the wasteland." In our dry periods... in the time when God's voice is more faint He is still making a way for us, a stream in the figurative wasteland of our life. We can always depend on the lover of our soul to do a new and exciting thing in our life. It might not be easy, or what we expected but it will be what's best for us! It will be our way in the desert.

Journey Day 406

I decided to go home to my parents house for the last two weeks of summer. I needed some refreshment and some perspective. I couldn't seem to shake my depression in Lburg and I needed to pry myself out of my funk and hopefully hear God a little clearer. I was a little nervous about going home for so long because I haven't kept in contact with a lot of people so I spend much of my visit sitting around my parents house. But I knew I needed my family and so I packed my bags and drove the 6.75 hours home. I love that drive because it gives one a large chunk of time to talk to God and clear your head. Needless to say it was the perfect start to my period of refreshment. Since day one of being home I have felt myself being renewed. I may not have a lot of friends in the Poconos, but luckily I come from a big family so there is always something to do. For example, today I got to sit in the middle of a big grass field and watch my little brother's soccer practice. He was adorable in his bright orange jersey that came past his knees, and I never felt so proud of him. I sat there journaling, reading and watching and I didn't feel an ounce of depression. It melted away, and all that remained was me... optimistic, happy Sarah. I've missed her, and slowly but surely I can feel her coming back and I'm loving every minute of it.

"See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." -Isaiah 43:19

Journey Day 404

I want to be a part of something bigger than myself. I want to be a part of a revolution. I want to have to give of myself... I want to sacrifice. I want to be filled with compassion and love. I want to be different, I want to be filled with Christ. I want to be far from who I used to be and closer to who God created me to be. Now I just have to figure out how to get there.

Journey Day 401

Today, as I was driving to PA to visit my family, God poured a healing truth into my heart. You see lately I have been struggling with my singleness and lack of absolute direction in my life. Sometimes I get mad at God, blaming him for my sadness, and accusing Him of wanting to keep the desires of my heart from me. "God don't you know how much I want to be in a relationship? Don't you want me to be happy? Jesus why isn't my life overflowing with new opportunities? Don't you want me to be successful? Where are you in my fear, and depression. Where are you in my loneliness and longings?" But as I was driving and listening to music, God answered all those questions. First off, there is only one direction and one type of success that really matters. The most important direction in our lives is following Christ, seeking after Him more and more each day. The success that God desires for us is more kingdom minded. Am I showing Jesus to people through my life? Am I loving others as Jesus would? Am I being His hands and feet? The success barometer the world uses is irrelevant to God. He measures in His own way. The more important truth for me though was this: God wants to give good things to me. He's not keeping a relationship from me to torture me, or make me unhappy. He's not trying to keep good things from me. His timing and will are perfect. When God doesn't give us what we want, when we want it, it isn't to make us miserable or keep us from something awesome. It's for a reason and a purpose. It's what's best for us and it is because God doesn't just want good things for us, He wants the best. Sometimes we are incapable of being objective and knowing what is the best for us, and so we are willing to settle for "just ok" or "pretty good". All the while, God is just hoping that we will wait patiently for what He has for us... for the absolute best... for the good thing that He has for our future. "For I know the plans I have for you." declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Journey Day 398

Today in church we sang "How He Loves", and I was standing there with my arms lifted high singing "Oh how He loves us so, Oooh how He loves us, how He loves us all." and "We are His portion and He is our prize, drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes." and out of nowhere it hit me... God loves ME! I mean I've heard this over and over again, but I think for a while now I stopped believing it. Not on purpose, and not consciously, but it happened. I got so caught up in feeling guilty about my depression, guilty about not going to China, guilty about not doing enough for God, guilty about being a bad friend, and guilty about not giving enough time to God that I got it in my head that I was too much of a mess for God to love. I think I had myself convinced that I was unlovable. So today as I was standing in church it hit me like a ton of bricks. God. Loves. Me. No matter what I do, or how many times I mess up God loves me unconditionally. Jon Acuff wrote in his blog "Stuff Christians Like" that often the God in our head is a mean God, and He wants to take away all the good things in our life, but in reality God is a God of love and a God of healing. The God in my head turned His back on me, and stopped loving me because I am such a mess... but the God in reality is holding my hand through the valley, and His heart breaks for me when He sees me broken. He demonstrates that love over and over in the bible. The book of the bible that best shows God's crazy awesome love for us is Jeremiah. God's people had turned their back on Him, but instead of Him leaving them and forgetting about them He  said "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." I love that last part... "plans to give you a hope and a future." It reminds me that even if what I'm going through in the moment is hard, God has a plan for my life. There is hope even when I might feel hopeless. No matter what I do. God. loves. me. I don't know about you, that was the reminder I needed. "I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way HE LOVES US."

Journey Day 396

Here are my dreams and goals for this year

- Excel in my classes 

- Find another PR opportunity

- Make a budget and stick to it

- Go to Nashville, Tennessee

- Take a weekend to myself in a cabin in the woods

- GRADUATE

- Get an internship

- Find a small group 

- Get plugged in at church

- Look for/find serving opportunities

- Find an older woman to mentor me

I'm looking forward to a new year with new opportunities. 

Journey Day 382

Confession: I am watching this season of the Bachelorette. I'm not super proud of this fact because it's filled with ridiculous guys and an even more ridiculous girl, but my friend Mary and I seem to just be glued to the screen. I was watching this past week's episode and something that one of the guys that got "let go" said something that really pulled at my heart strings... he said "I just want to love someone unconditionally". Isn't that the heart of all of us? We just want to love and be loved by someone else unconditionally. We want someone to wake up next to, someone to listen to and someone who will listen to us. This is true and romantic and non romantic relationships. I have friends who I know will love me unconditionally, and I have friends that I love unconditionally. It doesn't matter what happens, the love is solid. I think the longing for this type of love stems from our longing for community. We long for people to drink coffee with, laugh with, walk with, talk with, and cry with. We weren't meant to live life alone... we were meant to live a life filled with people and love. So while Ryan of the bachelorette might have a few screws loose, he had it right. There is nothing quite like loving and being loved unconditionally.

Journey Day 378

I'm just sayin... heartbreak sucks. It comes in all kinds of different flavors, but whatever way you slice it, it's just a terrible painful experience. It can be caused by a bad breakup... the one who you thought was THE one changed their mind and now you're left picking up the pieces. It can be caused by the end of a friendship... you both grew, but sadly you grew in different directions. It can be caused by an event, like the passing of a close family member or friend, or even making a mistake that reminds you that maybe you haven't come as far as you thought. Whatever the cause, the pain is real... and it sucks. Sometimes the pain lasts longer than the relationship did, or at least the effects of the pain do. I've been there... more times than I'd like to think about. The odds are that if you're breathing you've experienced heart break too, it seems to be an unfortunate part of the human experience. I wish I had a formula for getting through this ache, but I don't. Instead, each time my heart breaks I cry, I talk it out with my friends, and I remember these verses... "I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I will remember them and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself 'The Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for Him.' " (Lamentations 3:19-24) I think that these verses were created for the depressed and heartbroken person. It's so easy to throw a pity party, and to let our heartbreak consume us, but instead we have to hope in the Lord, and remember His love for us is GREAT and He will not allow us to be consumed by our emotions and our pain. He is the light at the end of the tunnel, and He is just waiting for us to realize that He is the light of our life.

Journey Day 377

My friend told me about this awesome song called Suitcases by Dara Maclean. It is just so freeing...

Suitcases
How can you move when they're weighing you down
What can you do when you're tied to the ground, yeah
You carry your burdens, heavy like gravity
Just let them go now, there's freedom in release

You can't run when you're holding suitcases
It's a new day throw away your mistakes and open up your heart
Lay down your guard, you don't have to be afraid

Just breathe, your load can be lifted 
There's a better way when you know you're forgiven 
Open up your heart, lay down your guard
You don't have to be afraid

Can you imagine what it's like to be free
Well, send those bags packing, they're not what you need
Abandon your troubles on the side of the street
Just let them go now, believe me

You can't run when you're holding suitcases 
It's a new day throw away your mistakes and open up your heart
Lay down your guard, you don't have to be afraid

Just breathe, your load can be lifted
There's a better way when you know you're forgiven 
Open up your heart, lay down your guard
You don't have to be afraid

There's nothing holding you back now, just run 

You can't run when you're holding suitcases 
It's a new day throw away your mistakes and open up your heart
Lay down your guard, you don't have to be afraid

Just breathe, your load can be lifted
There's a better way when you know you're forgiven 
Open up your heart, lay down your guard
You don't have to be
You don't have to be afraid

Journey Day 376

I've been trying to figure out a way to get more in depth in my bible reading and I found this website that has 5 steps to start a solid study of the bible and they seem like awesome practical steps so I thought I would share them with you! : )

Step 1- Reading:
- develop a plan
- read through the Old Testament once a year, note in the margins any truths to remember and write            down separately anything you odn't immediately understand. Use these questions for more in-depth study.
- for the new testament, read one book at a time on repeat. Start with a shorter book, like 1 John, and read it in it's entirety every day for 30 days. For the longer books, divide them up into sections. For example, John has 21 chapters so you can divide it up into 3 sections, 7 chapters in length. You read each section every day for 30 days. Using this plan you can finish the new testament in less than three years. (Reading through the bible isn't a race or a competition! You want to read it for comprehension) While reading, write down on notecards the major themes of each chapter of the book you are reading. For variety alternate short and long books.

Step 2- Interpreting:
-As you read scripture always keep on question in mind... "What does this mean?"
-Let the Holy Spirit be your teacher, using cross references, comparitive passages, concordances, indexes and other helps.

Step 3- Evaluating:
-Consult others to be sure you have been interpreting correctly, even if it causes you to change what you have always believed.

Step 4- Applying:
-The ultimate goal of a bible study is to let it speak to you and enable you to grow spiritually.
-If there is a command to be obeyed, obey it. If there is a promise to embrace, claim it. If there is a warning to be followed, heed it. Submit to scripture and let it transform your life.

Step 5- Correlating:
- By correlating and cross referencing you begin to build a sound doctrinal foundation on which to live.

Journey Day 374

This was some serious truth I needed today... "So far as the east is from the west so far has He removed our transgressions from us."-Psalm 103:12

I could dwell on my past and on the mistakes I have made in the past... in fact quite often I do... but God has sent my sin as far from me as the east is from the west. It does me no good to think of these things, all I can do is repent and move on, learning all the way. I have a hard time forgiving myself, because I seem to forget that God has already forgiven me. So folks it's time to let go and remember that my sins are gone... God doesn't see them anymore and neither should I. I need to lay them down at the foot of the cross and move forward. Tomorrow is a chance to live like we are truly made new... So lets all take it and let go of the sins that are trying to hold us back! WE ARE MADE NEW!!! : )

Journey Day 373

The past few weeks I have really been struggling with my weaknesses. My life is Romans 7:7-25, especially verses 15-24. It says, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good.. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but is is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do- this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?" I know what is right... and yet over and over again I choose to do the wrong thing. No matter how many changes I think God has made in me I seem to continue to make bad decisions and I keep falling flat on my face. I know I am a new creation. But sometimes, quite simply, I feel like the old me. I am really awesome at feeling guilty... in fact I am a pro and Satan feeds off of that and tells me all kinds of lies. "You'll never change. You are a failure, a bad friend and a bad person. This depression your feeling... it defines you and things are never going to get better. Your life is going to be filled with making the same mistakes over and over again." And then in that still small voice I hear, "I delight in you. I will quiet you with my love. I rejoice over you with singing. You will make many mistakes in your life and I will always be there to help you pick up the pieces. I will always be there to love you. My grace is big enough, and strong enough... in fact it is made perfect in your weaknesses. There is nothing you can do to make me stay away from you." Slowly but surely that voice is getting louder and I am getting quieter. And I am beginning to allow myself to bask in the truth that is God's love and grace. I have made and will continue to make more mistakes than I'd like to admit to, but even then God is still God. He is still good and He continues to love me unconditionally. That is a truth I am still having to reconcile myself to... no matter what I do I can't push God away and friends this is a truth I am so so very grateful for.

p.s. you should read Serious Wednesday with Jon Acuff... God is totally using him to encourage and uplift... so go be uplifted : )

Journey Day 368

God is good and I'm not going to China anymore... that friends is my life in summary.

Journey Day 3.6.5

1 year. 365 days. 52 weeks. 8,766 hours. 525,600 minutes. Filled with mountain tops and valleys and everything in between. 1 year of challenges... 1 year of growth... 1 year of transformation. I've lost some friendships and improved others. I gained clarity and I'd like to believe, some wisdom. I attained some self control in more ways than one. I faced my flaws and my faults head and on without any regret. But at the same time I failed in a lot of ways. I wasn't as good of a friend as I should have been. I let myself get into a spiritual lull. I was impatient and unloving. I still have not learned to control my tongue.  But I think most of all, throughout this year I'd like to believe that I have gotten closer to being a woman of character... that Proverbs 31 woman I've heard so much about. I know I still have a long way to go, and a lifetime of growth, but I'd like to think that through this year I'm getting closer. So thank you to everyone who helped make this year awesome, and here is to another year of challenges and blog posts! : )

Journey Day 364

I have an awesome family. Today we got in a family-wide fight at breakfast, complete with raised voices. But then at the end of the fight, we all just had this moment of openness and love complete with tears. It was amazing and real and it bonded us. I think maybe that's part of what love is. It's being able to fight, and cry, and open up and then when it's all over you love each other even more than before. My family is rambunctious, and loud, and crazy, and amazing and fun and hilarious all balled into one giant ball of awesome. I couldn't have hand picked a better family.

Journey Day 363

Today was day one of operation love better... and yes, it had it's successes and failures. I spent time laughing and playing with my little brothers and sisters, and I didn't raise my voice at them most of the day, but there were a few moments where I did get frustrated and yell at them for something dumb. I think with my family the best way to show them I love them is to spend time with them, and laugh and play. Every time I started to get upset with them I started to remember 1 Corinthians 13... and I stopped yelling or reworded what I was going to say. It's something that I have to keep thinking about and keep remembering because unfortunately being that loving big sister is not first nature to me. But I want to get there, and I feel like this is my first step in that direction. : )

Journey Day 362

Today I have three friends that got married, two of them to each other. What a special day. Of course this leads me to think about marriage, and love, and what all of that even means. I don't claim to be an expert or even have any kind of knowledge about the subject. I've dated, but I still haven't found the person for me so I don't really know what a good, healthy relationship would be like for me. But I think I know what love is... it's patient, it's kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it does not dishonor others, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs, it does not rejoice in evil but it rejoices in the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13 tells us that. Soo yes, I'm not a perfect person, and I don't love perfectly, but I have a guide for loving. A guide for loving not only significant others but my friends and family too. Following this guide is something I have to do more. If I did not anger easily than I would not fight with my parents or siblings as much. If I kept no record of wrongs I would not hold onto my anger, and forgive easier. If I was always patient with my friends I would love them better. I think you get the point. If I could follow this guide I would improve my relationships and they would know how much I love them. Ok, so this week I'm going to try to apply this guide to my life... I'll filter my thoughts and words through this section of 1 Corinthians 13. I can't pretend that I won't fall short of this goal, but I truly want to see if I can apply this principle to my life, and see how difficult it will be. This is will be the week of loving better.

Journey Day 361

Do you want to know what I find extremely difficult? Well I'm going to tell you... patience. I am really bad at being patient. Like I want to know what's going to happen, and I don't want it to happen tomorrow, I want it to happen right this moment. I want to get places faster, and I want time to speed by. I don't even know how to be patient... so folks that's where I am tonight. A serious state of impatience.

Journey Day 360

I just need to say that I love having a church home, and I love being involved in it. Tonight my church had a dinner and they needed someone to do childcare, so I helped them out. It was me against 12 kids from 2-9 and I had a blast! By the end I was ready for bed but being involved with that awesome group of people worth the small headache! That's a part of being in a family, seeing a need and filling it. And being a part of a family... a community, is what church is for! I could watch any sermon I wanted online or on tv, but I go to church to be with people, and live life with them. And while One CC isn't perfect, it's my family and for the first time in my life I actually have my very own church home. Tis a wonderful feeling! : )

Journey Day 359

Questions for night...

How do you know if you're following the Holy Spirit?

How do you know if you're making a decision based off of emotions? 

I think I'm getting a good handle of the answers to these questions.. but I'm also discovering that I'm still making mistakes and still learning. This journey of mine is certainly ongoing

Journey Day 358

So today I was making a powerpoint for the China presentation I'm giving this Sunday at my parent's church, and I found out some really awesome things about China and the spread of Christianity and I thought maybe you would want to share in my joy! China is a closed country which means some serious restrictions and little freedom. This sounds like it would bode very badly for Christianity, but as the bible says, what man means for evil, God uses for good. So God has used this political discontent and religious persecution to start something awesome in Asia. Christianity has increased 100 fold since 1949. Back then there were around 500,000 christians, most of which were Catholic. Now there are close to 130 MILLION Christians, and that number is still growing! It is being predicted that that number could double or even triple in this generation! At this rate Christianity will have a hand at shaping China... in other words when there are Christians in positions of power whether it be politics or even entertainment, China will be changed for the better! That made my little heart very excited. God is doing such an incredible work in a country that was once so closed off to Jesus. It just shows that no man, woman, or government can stop what God wants to do! He works in the best and the worst of circumstances and makes something beautiful : )

Journey Day 357

God is good. He's good in more ways than I can count or even begin to understand, and He is good all the time. When I feel broken, or like not even one thing can go right God sweeps in like my night in shining armor to save my day! Over and over again He comes through. Because I'm going to China it has been difficult to get a job because I'm only going to be in town for a month and a half or so. I have been praying that God would provide some kind of way to make income, and today I got a babysitting job. It will only be once a week, but it will provide some supplemental income and hopefully lead to more babysitting jobs! It's such a blessing and it is a reminder of God's goodness! He never ceases to amaze or excite me. No matter what happens to me, God will always be on my side.

Journey Day 355

Holy Moly... in 10 days it will have been a year since I started this journey o' mine. That's some crazay stuff right there. So much has happened... I mean I'm going to China for goodness sake. That was never on my mind even for a second a year ago! I know I have a long way to go, but God has already done so much in my life. I'm excited to see what this coming year is going to bring... I hope it's filled with just as many surprises as this year has been. I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.

Journey Day 354

So I think I've said it enough times on this blog, but I love to read. I always have since I was 4 years old and sitting in the library with my grandma. The latest book I just got to read is called Radical by David Platt. I think it's the perfect book to read as I transition into this time overseas. David Platt came to my school to speak at chapel, and it was awesome! He talked some about the underground church, but the timing of his talk was perfect. It was right around when I was deciding about China, and everything that he said just reaffirmed what I felt like God was saying to me. Ever since then I had been wanting to read his book, but just hadn't had the opportunity, but I'm finally going to get around to it! Side note: Funny brother phrases of the day... everytime I say the word "stupid" or "hate" he says "Soap in your mouth!" because we threaten him with soap in his mouth every time he says those words. The funny thing is he wants us to follow the rules, but he has no intention of following them himself. He's a crazy kid and we love him. I'm sure there will be many more funny Ethan phrases before he goes home, so stay tuned. Goodnight : )

Journey Day 353

I love when my family comes to visit me... how different that is from just a few years ago. My freshman year I was a bad daughter. I was rude to my parents, and I made them feel unloved, and unwanted. What kind of daughter does that? But the older I get the more I come to love, respect and cherish my entire family. Yes they're crazy, and yes they're loud, but they're awesome and they love me unconditionally. My parents taught me what loving God really looks like, and their awesome marriage has shown me what a healthy and loving relationship looks like. My brothers and sisters are so crazy and fun. Zach, Caleb, and I have some awesome conversation filled with laughs and serious moments. Isaiah is getting taller, and funnier every time I see him and Abby is entering the teenage stage which makes me feel old. Sammy is as adorable as ever and so funny and sweet. Ethan is getting bigger and funnier and more ridiculous every time I see him and I love it. I really couldn't have hand picked a better family myself. Through the good, the bad and the ugly I always know they will be there for me. Through the thick and the thin they are my family. Wǒ de jiārén

Journey Day 352

My school has this awesome little white prayer chapel so today I went there to spend some time with God. Like I said yesterday I have some big decisions to make. I sat on the floor of the chapel, listening to Gungor, and whatever else happened to play on my play list, and God comforted my heart. I was praying for Wisdom, and so I looked it up in the back of my bible. The first verse I read was James 1:5, "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." And then I read Colossians 2:2-5, "My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they might have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mysteries of God, namely Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine sounding arguments. For though I am absent from you in the body, I am present with you in spirit and delight to see how disciplined you are and how firm your faith in Christ is." Next I read I Kings 3:12, "I will do what you have asked. I will give you a wise and discerning heart, so that there will never have been anyone like you, nor will there ever be." And then last but not least I read Joshua 1:9, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." And God used each of these to comfort me and remind me of His promises. In order to receive wisdom I simply have to ask him for it, and have faith that I will receive it. And I can find that wisdom in Christ. I cannot be deceived by the resounding gongs around me, but I must concentrate on what God and His word says. I will be given a wise and discerning heart. The context of that verse is when Solomon asks God for wisdom and God says that because he asked for wisdom and not more riches and power God would give it to him. I don't need riches, or power all I need is wisdom to make the right decisions. And I should be afraid, or more aplicable to me, I should not be discouraged, for God is with me wherever I go. Isn't that the beauty of God's word? No matter what we're going through, God can still speak to us through it! So while yes I still have to make these decisions, God will give me the wisdom and strength I need!

Journey Day 351

I have a lot of big decisions I have to make within the next few days... I have to start spending some serious time with God... it all feels so big and heavy on my shoulders...

Journey Day 350

So question for you guys... if God's grace covers us all should we just bask in that grace and stop striving to stop sinning? Oooor should we continue fighting our sinful nature, striving to have our lives reflect Christ more and more? Pleaaase comment, or tell me in person, or shoot me an email... or just reflect on the question yourself : )

Journey Day 349

Tonight feels like the real beginning of summer. My classes are over... I don't have anything to get up for tomorrow morning... I can sleep in... it's summmmmmmmmer! WOOOOO! I should start reading a new book tomorrow... or maybe I'll reread one. But at this point I can do what the heck I want! So right now, I get to lay in bed, listening to my woodwick candle, watching scrubs and enjoying summer. Tomorrow is a new day, filled with new opportunities and new chances to be better. I hope that all of us will take advantage of that and fill our day with joy, productivity, and God. Goooodnight : )

Journey Day 348

Tomorrow I head back to Lburg. It will be an early morning of babysitting at church, and then it's nap time and then I get to hang out with my dear Meagan and her boo. Ahhhh summer, how I love thee. You are filled with magic, friend, vacations, rain storms and long drives. Wonderful. So summer, lets spend many more mornings, afternoons and nights together. And try not to leave as quickly as you did last year. I have a lot of friends to spend time with before I leave the country for 10 months. But thanks in advance for being awesome... I appreciate it.

Journey Day 347

So I seriously love coffee... but it sucks. I recently gave it up once again for the Daniel Fast, and basically, my body hates me. I lasted till about 10 am yesterday, and then slowly but surely my headache started to creep in. It's not like a normal headache. It's the type of headache that feels like it's eating your whole head. So I drank more water... but alas my head continued to ache like it was it's job. It was awful. So I slept... for almost 4 hours... and then laid in bed until 5pm... and then got ready to go babysit 11 children at church... all by myself. The headache continued to eat my head, and the thought of food literally made me nauseous. Lovely, yes? Ok, so then I came home from church, and then slept for like 10 more hours... and you know what? The pain isn't even over yet! The cycle of coffee and it's awful withdrawal effects will continue for about one to two more days. Anything that does that to your body is NO GOOD! I repeat NO GOOD! So friends, as much as I love coffee I do not love what it does to my body... booooooo!

Journey Day 346

Love Me by JJ Heller

He cries in the corner where nobody sees

He's the kid with the story noone would believe

He prays every night, "Dear God won't you please

Could you send someone here who will love me?

Who will love me for me 

Not for what I have done or what I will become

Who will love me for me

Cause nobody has shown me what love 

What love really means

Her office is shrinking a little each day 

She's the woman who's husband has run away 

She'll go to the gym after working today 

Maybe if she was thinner than he would have stayed

And she says 

Who will love me for me 

Not for what I have done or what I have become 

Who will love me for me

Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means 

He's waiting to die as he sits all alone

He's a man in his cell who regrets what he's done

He utters a cry from the depths of his soul 

"Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home"

Then he heard a voice

Somewhere deep inside 

And it said,

I know you've murdered and I know you've lied

I have watched you suffer all of your life 

And now that you'll listen I'll tell you that I

I will love you for you 

Not for what I have done or what you will become

I will love you for you 

I will give you the love 

The love that you never knew

Journey Day 345

Lately I have been feeling more discouraged than encouraged. I'm feeling far from God, and just lacking motivation and joy. I feel like I'm in a similar place to when I started this blog, and that is just not ok with me! But you know the crappy part.. well crappier... I am just lacking the motivation to actually get closer to God and spend time with God... I'm legit ashamed to even admit that. I know the only way to get closer to God is to spend time with him, and I do go through periods of time where I devour the bible... but right now I'm in a valley. Not just a plateau, but a valley. I haven't felt this far from God in a while, and I can't help but wonder why. What got me here to begin with? I'm hoping it's just stress related, but I think more likely than not it's China related. There's only 2 more months until I start this crazy journey to another country, and I think that Satan is trying his very best to get to me. I think that sometimes when you're trying to do something for God Satan attacks your weaknesses extra hard. He hones in on what is going to break  you and pushes that button until you 'splode. I don't tell you this to be a debbie downer, I tell you this because I am constantly striving to be real. I don't want to put up a front of a perfect relationship with God when behind the scenes I'm feeling broken and defeated. So friends, what you see (read) is what you get, imperfections and all. And I refuse to let Satan take me down. I know that right now I'm feeling a tad discouraged and broken, but I also know that God is still good, and that even if I feel alone I'm not, and that I'll come out of this spiritual funk closer to God than I was before it started. Even when I feel hopeless about the little things in life, I know that my savior is the great hope giver. 

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning"

-Lamentations 3:22-23

Journey Day 344

 So this is what I've been working on the past few days! A few friends asked me to help them out, so I'm using my mediocre design knowledge, and helping them out : )

Journey Day 343

My computer is about to die, which may be the best possible thing to happen to me... cause that means maybe I'll actually get to bed early tonight! Woohoo! But that also means I don't have the battery life left to write a good post... like I legit have 3 minutes left! So nighty night blogging world!

Journey Day 342

So starting this Thursday my church is doing a corporate Daniel Fast. Having done the fast before, I'm so excited. The church is doing it for 21 days, but I think I'm going to push myself a little further and do it for 40, making my last day July 18th. It's going to be more difficult, but I am choosing to chose God over the little luxuries. I really want to be preparing myself spiritually for the work God will be doing through me in China. I think this time I'll get even more from the fast than the first time I did it. Pastor Paul asked us two questions today. What are the things distracting us from God, and what are the things we need to lay down. I'm going to be prayerfully considering those things the next few days. I want to find the things keep me from getting closer to God, and I want to eradicate them. I want nothing in my life that is keeping me from the lover of my soul.

Journey Day 341

Today I realized that I've changed... for the better I think. I've been trying so hard, and God has been working so much in my life and today I realized that I'm not the same Sarah I was even 6 months ago. I'm following God's lead, leaving school and the people I love and I'm going to China for ten months to serve him. I react differently to situations. I'm learning to see the plank in my own eye. I'm learning to follow through with things. And while I'm not always the best friend in the world, I'm trying very hard to be better! Maybe no one else sees the changes in my life, but that's ok because I do. I know that God is working in new and exciting ways. I'm obviously far from perfect and I have my fair share of issues, but I'm just excited to see the difference in my life. Best part? I know this change doesn't come of my own strength, but instead it comes because I'm actually for once in my life depending on God. That my friends, is exciting in and of itself.

Journey Day 340

You wanna know what I love? Summer nights, that's what. Nothing makes me feel more at peace than stars in the sky, quiet, and a cool breeze. It's the perfect end to my day. For some reason it makes me get all introspective and deep. It makes me think about life, my relationship with God, my friendships, broken relationships, growth, things I need to work on, things I'm grateful for, and all the dreams I have and places I want to go. Summer nights do that to me. They seem to make everything in my life crystal clear.

Journey Day 339

I am...

-tired
-lacking motivation
-but at the same time determined
-filled with excitement about the future
-currently working on homework
-and drinking coffee
-broken and flawed
-loved and made whole
-excited for tomorrow (my most difficult summer class ends... definitely a reason for celebration so my two best friends and I are going to party it up... aka rent a red box and veg)
-nervous about the future
-grateful for grace
-enjoying the blue sky and sun shine
-hoping it rains (humidity=not cool)
-at peace
-starting to come off my stress mountain
-taking time to enjoy every moment today
-not letting the small things get to me

In conclusion... I am blessed : ) Today is a new day, filled with fresh chances, and new opportunities. YAY! : )

Journey Day 338

Today I am grateful for God's provision and for awesome friends. They make even the most stressful, bad day into something manageable and beautiful. Love, love, love it!! Laughing, chit-chatting, and relaxing was the theme of my evening, and I couldn't have asked for better! : )

Journey Day 337

Today Jon Acuff brought something to my attention that I am extremely guilty of. He called it "the reverse Jesus Juke". For those of you who don't know what a Jesus Juke is, as defined by urban dictionary, it is "when some Christian brings Jesus into an argument or conversation out of nowhere. Usually creating a religious argument within the original argument or conversation."Most commonly it is used to refer to people who are judging other people. For example this weekend my grandfather was basically Jesus Juking  Christians with excessive tattoos and piercings. And I was pretty upset with him. We had a good ol' argument. In fact I didn't realize it at the time but I was judging him for judging others. I was reverse Jesus Juking him. This might sound like a silly phrase, but honestly it's a serious heart matter. Who am I to judge him? I thought I was being all progressive and high and mighty because I was being so "loving and accepting", but in reality I wasn't being very loving of my own grandfather. I want to be like Jesus, and I strive to love others as Jesus did and does. I find myself often reverse Jesus Juking people. Judging people for judging... I think that is just as bad as just plain judging.

Journey Day 336

This has the makings of an extremely long day so I'm taking this free moment I have, and I am writing to you. I want to have a more adventurous spirit. Let's be real, I'm not the most exciting person in the world. I like having a schedule... I enjoy to-do lists and structure... I hate going out at night, and love going to bed early... the idea of spontaneity makes me break out in hives. While that last part is a tiny exaggeration it doesn't lie too far from the truth. It seems I hate adventure... but I don't want to. I want to take random day trips to places I've never been before. I want to climb mountains, and swim in rivers. I want to make new friends in the most unlikely places. I want to work in inner city areas with kids that didn't have the same privileges I did. I want to risk it all for something bigger than myself. At the core of me, I long for adventure... even though I seem incapable of acting on that longing. I guess that's a part of why I'm going to China. I'm tired of waking up every morning doing the same ol' thing. I am restless. I am excited to go and do and live. I want to live and breathe God's word. It's time to move on from Lburg... I used to wake up every morning and love where I lived. I used to go places and count down the days until I came back again. Now I count down the days until I get to go visit other places. And while I love all my friends that live here, I think it's time to go. It's time to engage my adventurous spirit.

Journey Day 335

Sometimes--- by David Crowder Band

Sometimes everyone of us feels
like we'll never be healed...
Sometimes...
Sometimes everyone of us aches
like we'll never be saved
Sometimes...

When we've given up let your healing come
When there's nothing left let your healing come
Till we're rising up let your healing come
Where you go we will follow

It's your love that we adore it's like a sea without a shore
We're lost in you 
Sometimes...

Sometimes it's like we'll never atone
For all the love we've known
Sometimes like in the smile or a song when you feel it come
Then that feelings gone
It flies

When we've given up let your healing come 
When there's nothing left let your healing come
Til we're rising up let your healing come 
Where you go we will follow
It's your love that we adore it's like a sea without a shore
We're lost in you 

Don't be afraid
Just set your sail
Let's risk the ocean; there's only grace!

Where you go we will follow
I'm on my knees
Where you go we will follow 
Oh God save me!
Oh God, send me!

It's your love that we adore it's like a sea without a shore!

Journey Day 334

This is going to sound super lame, and I hope you don't think any less of me. Today I was sitting at dinner, and my 7 year old little brother sits down at the table and tells me "Sarah, I don't think you're ever going to find your love." Aka, he thinks I'm going to be single forever. My little 7 year old brother made my heart hurt... so silly, I know. I thought about that statement way more than I should have, considering he's just a kid and has no idea what he's talking about, but a thought dawned on me. Even if I am single for the rest of my life and I never find my "love", that will be ok. Don't get me wrong, I want to find the one and get married and fall in love, but if that's not in the cards for me... well that's ok. Maybe I'll never have a love here on earth, but I have a heavenly love who puts stars and sunsets in the sky, flowers on the ground, and mountains all around me. He speaks sweet nothings to me everyday, and if He wants me to be single forever so I can serve Him completely, than I'm ok with that. I know it won't be easy, and I'll have more moments where my heart hurts a little, but I know that God will always be there to dry my tears and remind me of His love. I've certainly already found my love.

Journey Day 332

My communications class this term is extremely stressful, but you know what? It's probably my favorite class... ever. I'm learning so much, and it's really reinforcing that public relations is what I want to do. In fact it is helping me narrow down which part of the field I want to be in. I definitely think I want to work for a firm that represents non profit organizations. Some parts of public relations can be kind of sleazy, but if I represent ministries and non profits hopefully it won't be so sleazy. But we'll see, wherever God calls I will go. I have no idea how I'll feel after China, or where I'll be going, but I'm definitely excited to see! It's those type of thoughts that help me truck on through these classes when I'm incredibly exhausted or stressed. This is just one step in getting to where God needs me to be. So here's to tomorrow and all the craziness it's going to bring with it! : )

Journey Day 331

I lack words tonight, so instead you should look up Francis Chan on Youtube... : )

Luke Warm & Loving It

Journey Day 330

Today I'm forcing myself to see the silver lining of my day. It was a long day, but you know what? God was still good, and the day was beautiful, and my dog is starting to get better, and I have roof over my head, and I'm going to China for 10 months, and I have awesome friends, and I get to see my family in 3 days.... so basically I'm so stinking blessed that I really have nothing to complain about : )

Journey Day 329

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VI0pkRBPZw&feature=related

Today as I was doing hw I was listening to Gungor on Youtube, and I read something that warmed my heart and made me extremely excited! At the bottom of the video for "Please Be My Strength" there was a comment that said, "wow, just a fluke discovery, I'm not a christian, hope that doesn't matter, but this is beautiful and I'll listen to more of their music." Little does this person know that there is no way that this was a "fluke discovery", but instead it was God reaching out to their heart. Maybe this song won't make them love Jesus, but it opened the door and it planted that seed. God uses us to reach others, and that is something I have to constantly remind myself of. I can show people Jesus, or I can turn them away. It is up to us to use the opportunities God gives us, and to constantly be looking out for other people. Gungor was watching out for the person that left that comment without even realizing... how amazing!!

Journey Day 328

So on my way back from South Carolina (I was there for a wedding... more on that later!), I saw a sign in front of a church that said "Jesus needs us." The moment I read that my heart sank a little. Thinking that Jesus needs us takes away from the beauty of grace, and puts the spotlight on us. Jesus doesn't need us... he  WANTS us... I don't know about you but never ceases to amaze me. The minute we start thinking that God needs us we cheapen God's grace. His desire is for us... His need is for righteousness which is why He sent His Son to die for our sins... He wanted us enough to send His son to make us righteous. I don't ever want to get the two mixed up!

On another, let serious note, I was in a wedding this weekend and it was such a beautiful experience!! Here are some pictures from it : )

The boootiful bride : )

Journey Day 325

You know what's an awesome feeling? Accomplishment... that's what! This week, while it's been exhausting, has been extremely personally satisfying. I've been super on top of my schoolwork, while still getting stuff done for China. I'm even completely packed and ready to go for Mary's wedding weekend! Ahhh, gotta love it! But the most satisfying part of it all? I didn't do it on my own. That's right people, I had some extreme help of the supernatural variety. God totally gave me the strength and discernment to get everything done that I had to! Go Jesus, yes? Yes! It's nice to know that I don't have to get stuff done on my own, and in fact I can't! Granted I have my moments of sleepiness and exhaustion, but overall God has been giving me strength every step of the way. Also, this week I'm reminding myself that I need to bring glory to God in everything I do, including school. And that means trying my absolute best, and giving it my all!

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

        - Psalm 73:26

Journey Day 324

I wish that I was less judgmental... yes, that's right I said it... I struggle with being judgmental (along with a million other things). I seem to have a hard time seeing anything from anyone else's perspective. For example, tonight I was sitting near this high school group of kids, and the whole time they were being silly, and well... they were just being highschoolers. And in my mind, I was like what they heck is up with these kids? Blablablabla... basically I was just judging them, when all they were doing was having fun. And you know what? I used to be that same way, and sometimes I'm still ridiculous and loud and I'm 21! I truly want to see people the way God sees them... through loving and non judgmental eyes. My new goal and dream (after China of course) is to intern at The Simple Way. I want so badly to experience that kind of deep community and love for every single one of God's creation. They aren't legalistic, they aren't judgmental, and they actually put action to their words! I want to be mentored by someone like that. Also, I'm praying that God will make me humble enough to take constructive criticism with a joyful heart. I think while I'm in China I'm going to need that ability! So guys and gals, that's what's going on in my head today.... a whole lot of brokenness, and whole lot of gratefulness for God's grace!

Journey Day 323

I am so grateful the friends God has blessed me with. They challenge me, and they are honest with me. Sometimes the truth is a hard pill to swallow, and so sometimes our automatic reaction is to feel hurt and defensive, but I know that after I have some time to think about it I'm always grateful for their honesty. That is a true test of character I think... can you be honest even when it's difficult? I tend to be a people pleaser, so I never want to hurt anyone's feelings or step on anyone's toes so that means that sometimes it's hard for me to be completely honest with my friends. It's easier for me to tell them what I think they want to hear. But you know what? I think that I am doing them a diservice by not being totally truthful with them. I want to grow, and that means being challenged and pushed, and that requires honesty on my part, but also honesty from my friends. Follow Me to Freedom had me make a list of people that I admire and want to follow, and only one of them was someone that I didn't know personally.

1. Jesus (obv)
2. Shane Claiborne (he's the one I don't know, although I totally wish I did)
3. Meagan Van Engen (She's pretty much awesome, and she's honest with me even when I don't want to hear it... totes appreciate that)
4. Jenna Ketterning (She's my old roommate and one of my nearest and dearest friends. She's also honest with me all the time, and isn't afraid to tell me when I'm in the wrong! I respect her muchos)
5. My parents (Boy are they honest with me! Haha Sometimes I get upset when they are honest with me, but in reality I know their honesty comes with good intentions and I love them for it!)
6. Amber Hasson (She is my mentor, and one of the best friends I've ever had! Her friendship is such an incredible blessing to me!)
7. Kevin Jones (He's one of those friends that's honest with me, even when I don't think I want the honesty. He's also incredibly giving, and he likes to do it in secret which I so respect!)
8. Tiffany Hetzlein (We're newer friends and she's going to China with me! We have one of those friendships were we will bicker and fight, but at the end of the day we still love each other! Love that!)
9. I know there are many many more friends that I'm just incredibly blessed by, but the book only gave me so many lines to write on...so numero 9 is for the rest of my awesome friends that encourage, bless and challenge me!

So friends, thanks for loving me even though I'm a snot about 75% of the time! You'll never know how much you truly bless me! : )