Journey Day 273

The one thing in my life (other than sin of course) that has kept me from growing closer to the lover of my soul is guilt. The time when I really need to come before the throne of grace the most, is when I have the tendency to try to hide from Him. I feel guilty over small things, and I feel guilty over serious things... but guilt is guilt and either way it gets in the way of me and God. When I feel guilty, I feel ashamed, and when I feel ashamed I don't want God to see me, I feel like I don't deserve to be around Him. And you know what? I don't deserve to be near Him, but that is what grace and mercy is all about it. God gives us grace so we can be near to Him even when we least deserve it. When I feel guilty, ashamed, broken and alone is when I really need to be before my Abba because He alone can take the broken pieces and put them back together again. Even this week, there have been so many times that I have felt guilty about small things, and they put a wedge in between me and God. Every time I start to feel my wall of guilt go up I have to force it right back down again so that I can be close to my savior once again. Guilt only binds us and puts us in chains. God didn't send His only son to die a terrible death on the cross for me so that I can have guilt, and have it more abundantly... Jesus came so that I may have life and have it more abundantly. Jesus came to give me FREEDOM and instead, sometimes, I choose to live a life of bondage by worrying and by allowing my guilt to keep me from communion with Christ. So every time I start to feel some guilt comin on I force myself to take a deep breath and remember that no matter what I do God loves me, even when I fall short He still loves me. I haven't figured out the perfect formula to live a guilt free/worry free life... I'm still figuring it out one day at a time. But I do know that by the grace of God and when I am dedicated living a life modeled after Christ, the guilt gets to be less and less and less. So heres to a guilt-free, grace-filled life! : )

p.s. Sunday Serve was awesome!! It was such a blessing to 1. fellowship with other people at One CC, and 2. show the love of Jesus to people that maybe don't get to see it on a daily basis!