I am currently sitting in my favorite coffee shop enjoying a peanut butter chocolate cupcake and an iced coffee thinking of something that may even be semi interesting to write to you. All I can think to write is this... I doubt myself a lot. I start strong with confidence and slowly but surely it diminishes until every time I think about it I start to have a mini panic attack. Even when I know something is from God I still panic. The worst part is that when I panic I am saying to God "I know you're the creator of the world and all but I don't think you can help me raise the money to go on a mission trip, or I don't think you can make a way for me to go. I know you died on the cross for my sins and you bare them all for me, but I just don't think you can do it. Soooo I'm going to take matters into my own hands and I'm going to worry about it and panic. I just doubt you have it in you..." Even though I tell God I trust Him, by my actions I show the opposite. My actions show my doubt. I don't have all the answers, but I have to trust that God does and that he is going to fill in all the blanks!
"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet none of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."
Matthew 10:29-31
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